idle

deep exhales into thick air

i forgot to —

worship

the boxes drawn in my planner are still —

empty

i forgot the dishes last night my sink might —

overflow

belabored breaths into nothingness

i forgot to —

care

nothing’s there i’m on —

empty

the devil’s mind is an idle playground

or however that goes

i just know it goes

and goes

and goes

like a carousel in a —

playground

idol in a

playground

monkey bars and slides in a

playground

bars in a —

playground

i want to sleep

no sighs into stuffy air

just deep breaths

i want to —

sleep

while on my phone because i can’t stop

scrolling

can’t

stop

scrolling

and the sink has over —

flowed

it’s flooding and my pages are still —

empty

my eyes can barely open but i’m not —

sleep

i should

sleep

it’s been two months since i washed my shirt because i’ve been —

sleep

but my eyes can’t close

heavy bags under eyes that can’t close

a devil’s merry-go-round is an idle fantasy

or however that goes

it still goes

the idol goes

and the morning —

goes

and i still need to —

worship

A note from the author:

"Idle" is a poem where I correlate idleness to idolatry. I tried to make it a play on words since they sound alike. I wrote this poem to illustrate a person in a sort of depression, not doing anything productive, not writing enough, feeling super unmotivated, sleeping their days away, and how that impacts someone mentally, spiritually, and physically. The em dashes throughout are to represent long breaths, exasperated sighs if you will, to further bring home that point of how idleness makes you lethargic in every area. As I was writing the poem I realized how being idle is an idol in anyone's life (including my own) when it starts to consume you; an idol that replaces God. I hope that overarching idea is seen as the poem goes on.